Salieri said he was the patron saint of all mediocrities in Amadeus. It is easy for a person to fall into the opinion that she is mediocre. I’ve attended that pity party for too long. I wrote of my desire to live simply and that is a much better place than a desire to live with mediocrity. I took small steps yesterday toward that goal. After adding a number of items to the recycling bins and filling a trash bag (some things just have nowhere else to go), I realized I am applying what I teach to others about procrastination. Thirty minutes a day on an undesirable task and eventually it will be done. If I can’t handle the thirty minutes I can surely handle the “Tolerable Ten.” Any task can be tolerated for ten minutes. I am also using rewards. This may make me sound like a ten-year old, but these habits have been with me since I was about that age and I need rewards as I try to break the habits.
My reward tonight was to watch House without multi-tasking. It was lovely. I used to have several shows that I enjoyed and made a point of regularly watching. I’m down to just House. As shows have gone off the air, I haven’t found new ones to replace them. I don’t like “reality” television because I know there is nothing real about it. I went on casting calls for a few back in the day. And yes, I’ll show my age, former shows included Cheers, Friends, X-Files and Monk. I do enjoy the Wallander movies and word is that dear Kenneth will be treating me to some more even as the author announced he is done writing about Kurt. I usually multi-task while watching television shows but tonight I waited to put the laundry in the washer till after the show. I didn’t have the rhythmic spinning of the tub to distract me and I didn’t feel the self-imposed pressure to switch the clothes to the dryer when the cycle was done.
As House tried to remove his tumors, my boys were in their room reading the I-Spy book together. They had already eaten dinner (stroganoff, crescent rolls, and tomatoes covered with mayo, salt & pepper-the favorite summer veggie). We had talked about their school days and the fact the both had substitutes today. Harrison and I talked about not faking “the sicks” and spending the morning at the nurse’s office anymore. Hamilton tried to convince me he had milk with lunch and could have orange juice with dinner. When I explained I can see every single item they purchase for lunch (including the extra snacks) he changed his tune and welcomed the glass of milk. They cleaned up their train set-up, brought in the recycling cans and brushed their teeth. I watched House, guilt-free and totally focused.
Parenting has always been a challenge. It doesn’t matter when you were starting out as a parent, society was telling you how to do it. Today seems to be a bit more hyper about telling folks how to do it (many more laws and way more vaccines). It was so vogue to have your child in EVERYTHING by the time he was two. We have bucked that trend since day one. You can be a renaissance man over time, you don’t have to do it all at once. A couple of years back there were a few articles about not over scheduling your children. My husband and I said, great now we’re in style. Our boys play in the dirt, sometimes eat the dirt, and collect bugs. They “create” germs, write spooky stories, and howl like wolves most nights. And they know how to entertain themselves while their mother watches her Monday night show.
I am not teaching them that television is more important than them. I am teaching them that you have to unwind and relax. You have to stop everything and let your mind be reflective. Whether it is sitting and watching a show or movie, listening to music, or reading a book, you have to stop going, going, going so you don’t burn out. And sometimes you need to do this by yourself. So you can give of yourself fully to others the rest of the time.
After enjoying the episode, I tucked the boys into bed, we said prayers, gave goodnight kisses, and then I put the laundry in the washer. The clothes are ready for the dryer. Next I’ll practice my songs for Saturday night. Then it’s to bed after today’s last dose of antibiotic steroid drops and an ice pack on my left eye for the allergic conjunctivitis. I can fold the laundry tomorrow. Ah, simplicity.
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