As I always crave new school supplies in time for the arrival of the first day of school, I recently bought myself a new insulated lunch bag. It’s the Mystery Machine with Scooby Doo and the whole gang staring out the windows. That’s right, I will never grow up. The other annual tradition is singing Neil Diamond’s “September Morn” as the mornings grow chilly and the leaves start to hint at the orange about to peek out.
My sons went to bed tonight with mixed emotions. They don’t seem to want to show me that they are excited for school, perhaps they are afraid I’ll tell their friends that they actually do like learning. Or they suffer from the same anxiety their mother felt each September when facing a new classroom, a new teacher, and a new mix of classmates. The elementary school I went to wasn’t that big, there really weren’t any surprises waiting for me, yet each September my stomach would knot up as I wondered about the new school year.
My oldest is wondering how to stop talking too much. I told him third grade was when I finally figured it out. Although I have told him before that I had the same comments on my report cards, tonight he seemed to really hear me when I said the teachers always wrote, “her work is fine, but she needs to work on not talking so much.” He seemed a little relieved to know he’s not the only kid who has done this. He said some of the students don’t like him because of it and this upsets him. Mama Bear wants to go and talk to those kids, but that’s not how I need to handle this situation. I need to keep supporting my verbose son as he learns how to control the need to verbally express everything exactly when he wants to. So my heart will be with him tomorrow as he spends too much time trying not to talk. I hope he simply enjoys the first day of school and ignores the kids telling him that he talks too much.
My youngest was reminded to be patient with his classmates, especially if he has never met them before. I gently helped him recall that they will need some time to adapt to his pronunciation of certain words. I told him not to shout in their faces if they asked him to say something a second or third time. I encouraged him to remember that when I ask him to repeat something it’s because I really want to know what he thinks or feels and that the kids at school do too. Mama Bear wants to be there in case anyone makes fun of the way he pronounces certain words, but again, not how to handle it. Hug when he’s hurt by it and help him understand that this too will pass. Here’s hoping that he doesn’t hit anyone either. He doesn’t always have a reason when he does that. My thought is he does that when he’s just too frustrated about something. He also whacks his own head when he’s frustrated, though I’m beginning to think the real motivation behind that action is to get a laugh-which it is hard to not laugh when he smacks himself like Moe smacking Curly.
Each son will go to school wearing an outfit that makes him feel super comfortable with his uniqueness. The third grader will no doubt be wearing khaki shorts, a dinosaur t-shirt, and his beloved red vest. The first grader will be wearing his black skull shirt and black shorts. He wore his black socks today, so unless he pulls them from the hamper, (okay, who am I kidding)-unless he picks them up off the floor, he’ll have to wear white socks. They each have backpacks packed way too heavily with all of the school supplies they have to bring in and I’m even staggering some of the items. I truly doubt the teachers need 20 sets of dry erase markers or boxes of tissues or wipes on the first day. They can bring them in later this week.
And so my little Addams Family-esque sons will make their way into school tomorrow morning and march down the hall to their own drummers. They’ll be in separate lunch periods this year and each will be able to claim a bit of individual space as they scan their fingers to pay for the food (How cool is that? They pay by scanning their fingers! So much for brown bagging it!). And as I wipe tears from my face while taking an obscene amount of pictures, I’ll be praying that God helps them avoid peer pressure, listen to the important stuff, follow directions, and truly enjoy this ritual of childhood…the first day of school.
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