Rot in a jail cell

Today I heard about a road rage incident that happened out in Colorado a couple weeks ago. I hope the man who used his gun to solve this incident rots in a jail cell with no chance for parole.

I don’t know what the situation was. I don’t know if someone cut the other one off or someone didn’t use a turn signal or someone didn’t like another person’s car. But there was a road rage incident between a mother and her three children and this lunatic. She was taking her kids to the dentist. I doubt that was a very high pressure got-to-rush-and-race, cut-people-off kind of thing.

So this guy decides that the best solution was to take his gun and shoot the mother and her 8 year old child who are both now in the hospital with serious injuries. To take his gun and shoot her 13-year old child dead. Which means her third child may not have been injured (and thank God) but the child still had to watch all of that. That child had to watch the 13 year old die. The child had to watch the mother and the other child get shot.

At what point does being cut off by someone on the highway or someone being a left-lane-dick make it where the solution is to shoot them? The answer is simple: never.

So I know many do not believe in the death penalty and that is a topic for another day. In this case I think the best punishment this asshole deserves is to sit in a jail cell.

I think for the rest of his life he needs to sit rotting in jail surrounded buy pictures of that 13 year old. Pictures of that 13 year old playing sports with a big smile. Pictures of that child with the family on vacations or on holidays. There should be 13 pictures of that child in front of birthday cakes with the big goofy smile right before blowing out the candles. And that idiot who thought that his solution was the best solution should have to stare at them everyday and should have to realize what an asshole he is. And no visitation from his family. The 13 year old doesn’t get to see his family anymore.

This jackass claims it is because of his mental illness and a change in medicine that he decided to shoot this family as well as some other gentleman in the parking lot, who was there with his daughter and supposedly looked at the asshole. You know how I feel about mental illness. And maybe this guy is getting treatment, can’t say it’s the best since they’re not monitoring that medicine change that well. I also know that we need a national database that has up-to-date information on people who have a mental illness, their treatment plan, and an emergency contact. I don’t want to hear about HIPAA. I don’t want to hear about privacy. If you want school shootings to end, if you want random road rage shootings to end, you need to have this database. This won’t solve the gun crisis in America because criminals don’t buy their guns legally and they may not be seeing a doctor regularly that could monitor something like a mental illness. But if you look back at road rage incidents and school shootings, the person often obtained the gun legally or stole it from a family member who obtained it legally. This could make a difference. My heart goes out to the family. I cannot imagine the sadness and the sorrow they are working through.




Tonight I sat and watched as some of the younger boys in older son’s karate class finished their belt tests. A very nice lady asked me which of the boys was my grandson. Seriously? I mean really, seriously? Grandson? Do I look that freaking old? Okay, technically I could be a grandmother at this age if the timing in my life have been different. But grandson? Seriously?!?

The other day I picked up younger son from baseball practice. I had ordered a new pair of socks for him and I wanted him to try to guess what might be on them. I told him they were like his Illuminati socks. He was quite excited and I said that I hoped the suspense would last. In fact I said the suspense is terrible I hope it will last. And he said it wasn’t suspense because there wasn’t fear it was more of excitement or anticipation. So I said “I see you shiver with antici…….pation.”

He did not get the reference. So he asked what the quote was from and I told him it was a Tim Curry character named Dr. Frankenfurter.

He asked, “is that anything like Dr. Frankenstein?”And I said well yes, in a way.

He then said, “but I guess he really likes hot dogs.”

If you can’t find the humor in that you need to watch Rocky Horror Picture Show. Younger son knows he still has to wait to watch that Tim Curry movie.

Another shock of young lives cut short.

Another round of blaming whatever administration is currently in office.

Another strong stance by NRA, teachers’ unions, politicians.

None of that matters.

This extreme violence will not stop until there is improved treatment and support for mental health. Getting rid of the stigma and shame of having a mental illness is the needed change.

I heard an interview with someone from NAMI recently. She made a great observation. When someone gets a diagnosis of cancer or some other illness, or even a broken leg, or an operation, the person receives sympathy, support, offers to drive them to appointments, and lots of covered-dishes.

When you receive a diagnosis of a mental illness, it’s not shared, it’s danced around. Sometimes you are even told that it is probably best not to talk about it in certain places.

Our children are not learning coping skills. They are not learning social skills. This changes their perceptions of themselves. This can lead to a changed, altered, distorted view. Some will turn inward and just be as invisible as possible. Some will develop eating disorders. Some will become depressed. Many others will encounter their first episode of an illness like bipolar, schizo-affective, or schizophrenia.

Many of them will face it alone. They have heard too many negative and derogatory statements about mental illness so they will try to hide it, maybe self-medicate, until something becomes unmanageable.

Then they become a danger to themselves and others.

This pattern needs to end. If it doesn’t, all the other chatter and discussions and arguments won’t do anything.

We waited until our sons were older to name my illness. The stigma attached to schizophrenia is still strong. We didn’t want negative press about untreated schizophrenia, or mental illness in general, to cause them stress when the descriptions they could hear didn’t match their mom. They get it now.

I have contributed to this by following suggestions to not name it or even talk about it in certain parts of my life. That’s over. I can’t carry that anymore. If I continue to make it easier for others by avoiding it, making it where they don’t have to deal with it, then I’m part of the problem.

Start the conversation that can actually make a difference for our youth. Talk about mental health. Today.

My deepest sympathies to the latest victims.

“I’m Richard Dreyfuss. I don’t need this! I was in Jaws!” We love him. Jaws is one of, if not, younger son’s favorite movies. I love too many of his movies to list. But I will comment on how much I love Jaws The Goodbye Girl, Rosencrantz and Guildenstern Are Dead, Mr. Holland’s Opus, and I love him in Postcards From The Edge. And The American President. And Moon Over Parador. Of course, Down and Out in Beverly Hills. See? Love so many. Once Around. And What About Bob?

Although…that movie did/does contribute to the misconceptions of Tourette’s Syndrome…so one point deducted.

Obviously we also love him in Close Encounters of the Third Kind and he was kind enough to sign my lunch box what’s with the quote, “This means something”. He said that was one of the most important lines in the movie and, while he may have been blowing smoke up my ass, I think he probably was being truthful. He says the line twice in the movie and then another person says it a third time.

Mr. Dreyfuss was quite kind talking with my sons for several minutes about their names about presidents and treasurers. He really likes Civics and the history of our country and I think that’s pretty cool. He had a good appreciation for my sons’ names although they aren’t named after presidents or treasurers.

Lunch was actually at a little pizza shop. I will never complain about the price of pizza in my hometown again. A pizza in Manhattan requires a small loan. It was really good pizza.

Younger son and I went into New York City with the band and select Chorale for the musical field trip. This year’s show was Hello Dolly starring Bernadette Peters and Victor Garber. I thought the show was phenomenal- great costumes, sets, amazing choreography. And Ms. Peters is phenomenal. And I love Victor Garber. I had the good fortune to see Bernadette Peters in Annie Get Your Gun when a friend of mine was in the cast. It’s great to have seen her in a second show and I don’t know how she has the energy she does at age 70 because I, at age 47, was exhausted just watching the show.

It was a great day with younger son and I had a really fun time making that memory with him at his first Broadway play.

As we said hello to the lovely Kathleen Turner, my sons told her they mostly know her as Chandler’s dad. She laughed. I love that she directed folks on the camera angle to use. Her voice is amazing, so sultry and captivating. It demands that you listen.

Ms. Turner recommended I introduce the boys to Serial Mom. An excellent suggestion.