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Posts Tagged ‘Labyrinth’

We have stayed up late the past few evenings playing Battleship.  Not the newfangled electronic version, but the classic peg and plastic ship version.  It was Hubby’s when he was a wee small boy.  The boys love when they win and hate when they lose.  It’s been several nights chock full of learning how to be a good sport.  The marathon series of games helps that lesson.  There is always another game and another winner.

Life is about winning and losing.  There is no way of getting around that.  The “cards” you are dealt may not seem fair, but truly is what you do with the cards that matter.  You can always discard them and hope for better.  You don’t need to sit there and bemoan your lot in life, change the cards and see what happens.

We are trying to help Younger Son realize that he can change his cards.  Fourth grade does not have to be remembered as the year of the bully.  It has been filled with so many wonderful events, life milestones, and new accomplishments.  And I do believe I am seeing some signs of him moving forward in this idea.  As with anything with nine year olds, it is two steps forward, three steps back, but he is getting there. A more positive outlook, kind words, kind actions, and allowing himself to be and feel happy.  We slowed things down, as much as we could, and it is making a difference in helping him remember that the bully has no power over him.

He likes quoting Sarah.  “You have no power over me.”  He is re-embracing his uniqueness and savoring marching to his own drummer.  He is remembering that he is an Addams!  He’s remembering he can sink that Battleship!

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Labyrinthitus.  Yep, with positional vertigo. The world is spinning when I move and I’m not even drunk.  Not one drop of peppermint schnapps.  Yet the room spins as if I did.  Not supposed to drive either.  For a while. Yeah, that’ll happen.  Actually, Hubby will be doing the driving over the next week or so anyway, so in one sense, good timing.  The anti-vert script does NOTHING!  This sucks.

However, we do pick up older son tomorrow from camp. He has been there this past week for music camp. Younger son misses him.  So do I.

I am not a good patient when it comes to the “rest and don’t do a lot” direction. But then the room spins and I sit back down.

Welp, gonna go watch Labyrinth.

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Am I a good mom? Just never know. I do the best I can but some days I question myself more than other days. Today was one of those days. Seems my sons move too much, are too disrespectful, and their behavior is disappointing. Hmmm…that all reflects back on parenting, doesn’t it? The funny thing is they were moving when they were supposed to, and while some choices today were disrespectful, today wouldn’t have happened without two very giving choices they made, and those same choices demonstrated behavior that helped the greater good even if it meant the boys were out of their comfort zones.

We did a skit at church today. That should explain the moving. The children were using masks in a style inspired by a combination of Greek theater and Kabuki for the skit. They moved them and rotated them at specific times. But my sons were the only ones commented about for moving too much. While they didn’t follow directions perfectly throughout the morning (disrespectful and disappointing behavior), if my two sons hadn’t stepped up and taken the two roles they played, the skit would have been a lot shorter. No one else wanted to have a speaking part. Not my sons’ first choices either, but they went out of their comfort zones to help their mom while she was directing yet another skit at church.

What did I learn from today? I know my sons have interests that are not mine and I know they try to support me in my interests. But I won’t make them be in any more skits at church. They’ll have to be jumping up and down, begging to be in it before I’ll think they really want to be in it. I also learned that my sons talk to me about everything and share how they are feeling and that will make a big difference in their lives. Just as I finally realized that they need help remembering to keep their rooms clean, and that cleaning the room when it gets totally out of hand is too big of a job for them alone, I need to not spend as much time on my interests yet. I spent at least 15 hours outside of church working on the skit. That’s 15 hours on lots of wonderful children, but not 15 hours spent in depth with the two children most wonderful to me. While I enjoy keeping a toe in theater, in any capacity, much like when I did Mame, it’s just not quite a good fit yet. Next skit would have to remain self-contained in the time at church. Or maybe someone will volunteer to direct the next one. Okay, and back to reality. I’ll do the first idea-completely self-contained in church!

I didn’t get offered a spring class at the university-cut backs, but the extra time gained from not grading papers has been great. I like finding the silver lining in that. Spending four or five weeks on a skit and on the performance day having my sons leave crying, not the silver lining I was looking for. They helped with the stuff at home so we did spend time together while doing the work, but it was something for my interest, not their interest. I feel like a parent should be supporting their kids more than the other way around. I know kids support their parents–I get that should be there too-but shouldn’t more support being going from parent to child? I’m being selfish if I force them to be dragged to my interests, sacrificing their interests in the process. And being in a skit isn’t really their thing, it’s a “let’s help out Mom in her thing” thing.

It was a day full of ups and downs. I will not remember the skit, not my sons crying about what they were told, but instead remember the deep belly-laughs as we returned home from 7-11 with nachos and Slurpees. I’ll remember how we laughed during our discussion about what to have autographed by David Bowie. I’ll remember that we watched Labyrinth cuddled up on the couch, staying up a little past bedtime in the process.

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labyrinthThe boys have gotten hooked on Labyrinth.  I find the best way to get them interested in a movie that I feel is a classic, one they need in their repertoire, is to not ask them to watch it.  If I simply start watching it, they will usually join in and discover it “on their own”.  Younger son has asked to watch Labyrinth several times since the first time he found it on his own.  Both are walking around quoting it and singing the awesome David Bowie songs.  At first, they weren’t sure about this guy playing the goblin king, but when I explained that he was the other singer with Queen on “Under Pressure”, he gained points immediately.  They have loved learning that Jim Henson was the mastermind behind the movie.

It’s funny.  The boys were never that into Sesame Street.  They knew who Kermit was, and a few others from the neighborhood, but they never became regular viewers.  The Muppets came closer to their interests.  But Labyrinth really connected with them.  I can’t wait till they “discover” The Dark Crystal.  The Skeksis and Mystics, the Gelflings, the shard!  I do a mean impression of Aughra!

The boys are growing up faster than I would like, but if we can share some movies, books, stories, memories, and keep creating ways to open conversations, I’ll be happy.  The Labyrinth has already opened ways for the boys to talk about feeling like they don’t fit in at school.  Sarah is an awesome geek hero (I can write this because I, too, am a geek).

group labyrinth

 

 

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