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Posts Tagged ‘children’

I can’t resist

Posted in Musings and Epiphanies, tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , on December 5, 2011| 1 Comment »

My six year old said during dinner this evening, “I can’t resist food…it’s just too good.”  Monday night is pizza night.  It used to be on Friday nights, but I don’t mind making dinner on Friday night, I have the time.  Monday night is chaotic, so we switched pizza night.  They truly couldn’t resist.  They polished off their pizza and started attacking the parents’ pizza.  They also ate half the bread sticks.  He was right, he can’t resist.

And now a question.  (It’s an interrogative statement seeking knowledge, but that’s not important right now.) Who is Coupon Suzy and why must she invade my world so often?  They are awful commercials.  Highly annoying lady.

Charlie Brown is on and memories of childhood come flooding in to my mind.  “Of all the Charlie Browns in the world, you’re the Charlie Browniest.”   The cartoons of today don’t seem to have the staying power of the old ones.  The classic Christmas shows are on every year, but I don’t know that the Shrek one will last for forty or fifty years of annual showings.

The classic is, of course, The Year without a Santa Claus…Heat Miser and Snow Miser…I’m too much!

The Peanuts gang is tackling some serious issues.  Phobias, depression, the need for real estate, the over-commercialization of holidays.  Plus they pepper it with historical references (the Red Baron, no, not the pizza…Baron Manfred von Richthofen).  You know how they balance all the world pressures?  Their deep appreciation for culture.  I dare you to watch them dancing to Schroeder tickling those ivories and not stand up to join them.  Love the way they dance mostly because I can dance like them.  It’s a very free dance style, when one didn’t care about how one looked while dancing.  It’s like the way Phoebe ran (see the Friends episode).

No matter what religion you have faith in, even if you don’t follow religion, one thing about Christmas-time is universal.  It can bring out each person’s childlike wonder in the world.  It can help each person to remember to simply be nice, every day of the year this is possible, but somehow each year at this season, it seems a little easier to do.  Yeah, it’s the Dickens in me.  Yes, it is a wonderful life.

Winter is a time for shedding the old and looking to the future for a new way.  Perhaps you do live each day in the past, present, and future.  If you do, you can renew your energies during the winter season, flowering in the spring with nature.  If you don’t live each day this way, you can start.  Winter is such a reflective time, the days are shorter and darker and colder.  You can turn inward as you stay indoors.  You can let go of your past yet keep it with you to remind yourself of where you’ve been and where you’re going.  Don’t live for or in the future so much that you miss the moments you are in.  Cherish the present as it truly is a gift.

So as my sons can’t resist pizza, I can’t resist putting my thoughts down, pen to paper, or at least the digital version.  I know most think being called Scrooge is an insult.  But think about it.  Think of how the story ends.  I wouldn’t mind being called Scrooge.  Bah humbug-not to anything-it’s just a fun phrase.

 

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Little Social Creatures

Posted in Musings and Epiphanies, tagged , , , , , on December 4, 2011| Leave a Comment »

The boys and I were shopping today for the presents for the tags we pulled off the tree at the library.  Each tag has a request from a girl or boy for presents.  You return the presents with the tag back to the library and the volunteers deliver them to the children.  As we were walking around the store, my youngest ran into a friend from kindergarten.  The two greeted each other like little men and stood talking as if they were in their 30s and not only six years old.  They caught up on what each one was doing, compared first grade teachers (since they are in different classes this year), and discussed toys they are hoping to receive on December 25th.

As I chatted with the mom, I watched both my sons.  My oldest made small talk with the older sister (she’s in second grade) and gave his brother space to socialize with his friend.  It is so much fun to watch them being the little social creatures they are.  I love watching them as they crawl out of their egocentric cocoon.  We all remain egocentric to some degree, one could argue Maslow’s theories require this, but we branch out as we grow up.

This eight minute exchange in a department store helps them begin to learn social niceties and graces.  Selecting a tag from the tree at the library and giving thought to selecting presents to give to children who are waiting for a happier situation helps them become aware of the world around them.  And today the social niceties also brought a surprise bonus.  The friend and his sister were at the store doing the same thing-picking out presents for the children on the tags they pulled off the tree at the library.

How cool was that…to find being gracious and thoughtful at this time of year for little children who you only know through a tag is cool.  My sons walked away with smiles on their faces.  I walked away with a smile in my heart.

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Friend is only one letter away from fiend.

Posted in Musings and Epiphanies, tagged , , , , on December 1, 2011| 1 Comment »

This evening my oldest son teased his father using a less than flattering phrase he learned from his “friend”.  He apologized to his dad and knew that tomorrow he would be spending the afternoon in his room.  As my son and I discussed why this “friend” may not be the best friend he wants him to be, his younger brother chimed in with the various ways this boy has teased him.  I reminded my oldest that he didn’t stop this friend from being mean to his brother.  I reminded him of his two other friends who have said they didn’t want to play with this boy because he had been mean to them too.  I pointed out that this makes three children who he has been mean to.  It isn’t hearsay, we know this from the actual children.  We discussed again some of the things that this boy has done over the past few months.

This is when my six year old informed me of what the friend’s older brother had called him.  I will not write it here because I believe our country has been working to end racist behavior.  Still, this 12 year old called my six year old a dreadful term.  I know I didn’t teach it to him, yet there my six year old son sat explaining to me what the word means.

This is a lesson I didn’t want them to have to learn this early in their lives.  But, I don’t get to choose when they start learning life lessons.  The oldest took it rather hard when I stated they were not allowed to play with the boys until my husband and I have a chance to discuss how we plan to handle this situation.  Do we sit down the parents and explain the situation to try to figure out where, why, how their oldest came upon the word?  Do we pull back for a while and just let the relationship wither away?  I don’t know yet.  Time will bring me the answer.  Time will hopefully help my oldest realize that sometimes a friend is closer to a fiend.

 

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Real reality television involves felt and fur

Posted in Musings and Epiphanies, tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , on November 23, 2011| Leave a Comment »

I was brought back to my childhood today.  I was eight years old, sitting in front of the black and white television set, and singing along.  “It’s time to play the music.  It’s time to light the lights.  It’s time to meet the Muppets on the Muppet Show tonight.”  Oddly though, this time my eight-year old and six-year-old were sitting with me.  The Muppets was an amazing movie and a truly fun experience. The parents were all chatting about our memories and filled with excitement about seeing our childhood friends again.  The children were excited too, but with a different type of energy.

The theater my sons and I went to was incredible.  It was so old-school and reminded me of the theater I used to go to at the Quaker Bridge Mall.  This one was an AMC 8 and it was great.  We don’t go to movies often because the buildings are too big, there are too many people, and too many cell phones.  This one is only twice as big as the one I grew up going to and still has the same kind of service.  For example, as we sat watching the previews, an usher came in to bring someone the food that wasn’t ready when they were at the counter.  Then during the movie a person turned on her cell phone.  Within thirty seconds an usher was there telling her to turn it off.  Yes-there were ushers in the theater the whole time to monitor.  The audience was well-behaved (parents included!).  It was the magical experience I remember the movies to be from my childhood.  We will be going to this theater regularly.

Then add that the movie was hysterical.  Spoiler alert-I’m about to share details.  If you want to be surprised, I am sad to say it, but stop reading.  Kermit, Miss Piggy, Gonzo, the whole gang plus Mickey Rooney!  When Amy Adams says “this is going to be a short movie.”  Traveling by map.  The balcony guys.  Uncle Deadly (I think that’s his name).  Sam the Eagle.  Whoopi, Jack Black, people that I am sure the tween-set will recognize.  The songs were so Muppety.  The humor was the same but with a slight 21st century edge.  The music seemed very Paul Williams-esque.  And yes, I cried as I quietly sang “Rainbow Connection” along with Kermit.   It just felt so 1970s.

I know that some of the Muppeteers didn’t completely like the screenplay.  Let it go.  This brought the Muppets into today and kept their hearts pure.  Even with a wee bit of an edge, the Muppets are still so much sweeter than anything else out there.  It’s something parents and children can really enjoy together.  It’s intelligent humor (okay, Fozzie’s fart shoes don’t quite fall under that category, but it’s FUNNY).  If we want real television, it needs to connect with us emotionally.  These pieces of felt and fur accomplish this with little to no effort. The Muppets connect our entertainment past with our present and future.  The concept of a vaudeville theater and a variety show fully embracing the concept of live theater is wonderful and needed.  Plus we want children to grow up to be accepting of all the different types of people in the world?  Then watch the Muppets!  No judgement anywhere!

The photograph cameos by the late great Jim Henson brought tears to my eyes.  I believe he is smiling as he watches the generation who grew up with the Muppets share a new movie with their children.  My sons have already seen other Muppet movies (Muppet Christmas Carol and Muppet Treasure Island are staples in our home).  I would love for the Muppet Show to return to television.  I would love to be able to sit with my sons and laugh with these adorable felty, furry, and fuzzy creatures each week.  Thanks to Jason Segel for bringing them back.  Thanks to Jim Henson for creating them.

Mahna mahna (feel free to substitute Phenomena)

Do doo be-do-do

Mahna mahna

Do do do do

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Here sleep dinosaurs

Posted in Musings and Epiphanies, tagged , , , on November 22, 2011| 1 Comment »

My eight year old has been a paleontologist since he was about four.  Even more impressive is that he could spell paleontologist since that time as well.  He knows dinosaurs like the back of his hand.  The bedroom is painted with dinosaurs.  So far Mommy-artist has finished the t-rex, volcano, and velociraptor.  The Brachiosaurus has been sketched onto the wall but not painted.  That is a great project for this weekend, just a little note to self.  The other bedroom, which is more of a playroom, has the shark from Jaws and other sea creatures painted on the walls.  Neither room is ever very tidy.

But yesterday when I came home from work the boys proudly showed me they had made their bed and kept the dino room clean all day.  How?  Why?  They got new bedding as an early Christmas gift.  Dinosaur bedding.

Honestly, I think I was more excited than them at first.  I have looked for dinosaur bedding for several years and had only found “baby” or “toddler” stuff, nothing that was “grown up” enough.  This bedding has great dinosaurs, dinosaur tracks on the sheets, and neat stripes on the other side of the reversible comforter.  It looks great with the existing colors of the bedroom, including the curtains (What, the curtains?).   They feel very grown up with their new bedding and triceratops LED night-light.  Who knew it would help motivate them to keep their room tidy?

They also have been enjoying a dvd about dinosaurs that they keep watching over and over again.  But I don’t mind.  It’s narrated by Kenneth Branagh.

My little dinosaur hunters are becoming quite the big boys.

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Autumnal Leaves

Posted in Musings and Epiphanies, tagged , , , , , , , on November 13, 2011| Leave a Comment »

Once I was done vacuuming the rocket sled (the boys thought it would be fun to see what made the rubber chicken so squishy-little styrofoam balls, in case you were wondering), it was time to participate in suburbia’s annual ridiculousness known as raking the leaves.  When did we forget that God had a pretty good plan when He designed trees?  And the seasons?  The trees lose their leaves and they fall to the ground.  If we were to leave them there, their nutrients would go back into the ground and they naturally mulch plants that need mulching.  But no…here in suburbia, we want neat, well-manicured lawns.

I rebel against this in several ways.  First, today was the second time I raked and dragged the leaves to the curb.  It will be the last for the season.  I’ll just “not have any more time” to work on this task.  This way I’ve conformed enough to the societal demands, yet still leave enough leaves to let them do their natural jobs.  When my neighbor says something, and she will, but always in a gentle way, I’ll simply say it’s tough keeping up and hasn’t the year gone quickly?

Another rebellion is to mow my lawn but keep the height of the mower so the grass doesn’t get a crew cut each time.  This helps keep more moisture if the rains take some time between showering us with water and makes the grass wave ever so slightly in the wind.  I know my lawn is an even mixture of grass and weeds, but the flowers of the weeds are so pretty.

My other rebellion involves my holly trees.  I used to hate them.  They were in bad shape.  They were planted way too close to each other (they came with the house) and in need of serious shaping.  I still haven’t properly shaped them, but I stopped trying to get rid of the natural underbrush that grows around them.  Turns out this provides a lovely home for birds.  Remember the movie Over the Hedge?  We’ve pushed the little woodland animals aside and then with our beautifully manicured lawns, with no underbrush, taken away any possible refuge for the critters.  I read that keeping an area like this in your yard provides a natural habitat for birds and is more effective than any bloody bird house you could stick out there.  The holly trees and the viney plants that grow around them provide shelter, a place to build their nests, protection, and food.  It’s lovely walking by it during the spring and summer-lovely little bird noises coming from it.  During the nesting period, it can be a little tricky for our dog.  Those mama birds interpret him as trouble if he walks too close and he has had a few birds dive bomb at him.  Fortunately, he’s gigantic and we walk away before the birds do anything serious.

So, if you are partaking in suburbia’s ritualistic insanity of undoing the good work God did in designing trees and leaves, go light this year.  You’ll have a greener lawn next year with less work.  Let your dog fertilize your lawn too.  That’s what we do.  For every season…

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Grace and daily life

Posted in Musings and Epiphanies, tagged , , on November 12, 2011| 2 Comments »

Grace.  Graciousness.  I ponder this concept daily.  I try to be graceful or gracious each day, but there are moments each day when I lose the grace.  It could be on my commute to work when someone cuts me off…actually whenever this happens I lose the ability to be graceful.  I don’t understand the people who change lanes every few minutes, especially when the flow of traffic is at a crawl.  Do they truly believe that jockeying for a spot in front of one more car in the other lane will get them to work any sooner?  And during these traffic jams, I despise when the motorcycle forgets that we’re supposed to treat them the same as any other full-sized vehicle and magically drive on the dotted lines.  Hello!  Sit in the traffic like the rest of us, you putz.  See, the grace disappears even while writing about it.

Once I lose my cool I then get angry with myself that I lost my grip on grace.  I am getting better at letting that go quickly, but I need to stop losing the grip all together.  I maintain grace pretty well at work (I think).  I feel as though I use up most of the reservoir of grace throughout the work day.  What I have left over at home always seems to take more effort.  I know grace is always attainable, so is it that I’m meaner at home or is that I feel as though the ones I love are able more easily to take me losing grace?  The irony is the ones I want to shower with grace and love and patience seem to get the leftovers.  This is not the way I want it.  I need to be more disciplined in the way I share grace at home, without simply spoiling the boys out of guilt.

The boys are having an awesome streak.  They’ve been very loving, very into sharing, and working their manners like maniacs.  They are in full “I want that for Christmas” mode.  Must avoid commercial television-would help me to keep my grace!  They want everything that isn’t pink.  Most items have lots of small pieces (further challenges to grace).  I can’t see Santa bringing many of those though since they haven’t gained consistency in taking care of the many small pieces they currently possess.

But the big gift they each want is a bike.  Hamilton can ride, with training wheels, but he doesn’t practice very much.  I’ve never even seen Harrison try to ride a bike.  The only good part about this is at least I didn’t miss while I was at work.  If Santa does bring bikes, I really will have to finally get new tires for the bike I bought at a yard sale three or four years ago.  It would be nice to go riding with my sons in the spring.  Hopefully, the cup of grace will be running over when they learn how to ride.

Sleep calls.  One of many ways to recharge the grace battery.

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Jersey Devil Hunt

Posted in Musings and Epiphanies, tagged , , on November 7, 2011| Leave a Comment »

On Sunday, the boys and I had a blast hunting for the Jersey Devil.  We made a little film of the boys’ adventure.  This is the trailer to the film.  Hope you enjoy it!

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Grimm fiction and fact

Posted in Musings and Epiphanies, tagged , , , , , on November 4, 2011| Leave a Comment »

I really am enjoying Grimm.  I like the use of the fairy tales and acknowledging that the stories were, in fact, grim in their original incarnations.  The fantastical stories have always been ones I’ve enjoyed.  It would be great if the show inspires folks to read the stories again and revives fairy tales in the world of literature.  I am optimistic that the actors will start to relax a bit and settle into their characters.  They took care of the necessary exposition within the first two episodes, I hope.  Now just keep getting deeper into the legends, the rules, and how the blond chick is involved.  A little bit of X-Files conspiracy action is slowly being built into the series…I hope.

Not changing the channel quickly enough, I then got sucked into another grim show.  Dateline was covering the Michael Jackson trial.  I wasn’t there, I didn’t know the man, but the doc seems like he was involved.  It’s tacky, really tacky, to continually change so many parts of the story when the only person who could truly and accurately counter the doctor’s version is dead.  That’s grim.  Why do people feel so compelled to lie?  In the case of Jackson’s trial, it’s a big deal to be dishonest.  But there is dishonesty in so many parts of this world.  Students lie to teachers, children lie to parents, (and sometimes parents to children) but usually these lies are small lies that won’t impact anything in a large way.  So then why not tell the truth and deal with the consequences (because I can’t let go of Santa yet!)?  I know why the doctor doesn’t want to necessarily tell the truth-he could go to prison.  But why tell the little ones?

Like when I asked my sons who played Tic-Tac-Toe on the wall going up the stairs the answer was “not me, not me.”  Then who did, a ghost?  I know my mother-in-law wouldn’t write on my walls and that’s the only ghost I know of in my house.  Why do they stick with the lie?  But the writing is on the wall-it doesn’t particularly matter that neither one owned up to it, they both will have to work at getting the writing off the wall.  Not as grim as the show or the trial, but still…

Speaking of grim, the fun plans for tomorrow include hunting down the Jersey Devil.  My oldest son is psyched and really hopes we find him.  My youngest son wants nothing to do with it and claimed to have a stomach ache this evening laying the groundwork to cancel the hunt.  It is tricky to satisfy both boys’ hopes for tomorrow.  “Yes, we’ll probably find the Jersey Devil…well, maybe we’ll find some evidence and just enjoy a nice walk in the woods”.  I just hope the “evidence” we find doesn’t include any carcasses.  The older one has already collected bird bones from the neighborhood that he attributed to JD.  Yes, I made him wash his hands for two or three hours.

Ah, boys.  It can be grim.

 

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Halloween Spooktacular!

Posted in Musings and Epiphanies, tagged , , , , on October 21, 2011| Leave a Comment »

This evening was spent with two of my favorite guys, my sons.  We went to the school’s Halloween Spooktacular!  On Tuesday, when my sons asked to go to it, I realized that I now had three days to make their costumes instead of the ten I thought I had for the Harvest Party we’ll be going to on October 29th.  I stayed up rather late the past few night to make a clown costume and the cape for the Headless Horseman.  Neither was completely finished for this evening, but…I think the costumes turned out pretty good on three nights of work.

The boys had a blast.  They also were not overly embarrassed that I was the only non-volunteer parent in full costume.  Not many more years when that will be the case.

I realize full well that they will not want home-made costumes much longer (in fact, my youngest had a store-bought last year, he really wanted to be the Creature from the Black Lagoon).  I adore making their costumes.  I love that they enjoy coming up with their own ideas and use Halloween as another way to demonstrate their uniqueness.  There was only one clown and one Headless Horseman at the party tonight.  They also did not win the costume contest for their grades.  Store-bought costumes won.  This was not the trend when I was younger, but then again, store-bought costumes weren’t the trend either.

It was a hard lesson for my oldest however he handled it really well.  He didn’t ask to leave right away and he reflected about the experience as I was tucking them into bed.  He said that while he was sad and disappointed that he didn’t win, he still had a really good time.

He also aid I “totally deserve to sleep in tomorrow” after staying up the past few nights.  They do have sweet moments.  I love them so and wish I got to spend the majority of my waking time with them.  Soon I will not be cool.

My youngest didn’t want to Monster Mash with me.  He used to dance with me in public.  They wanted to go trick-or-treating “on their own” but that didn’t float.  I’m seeing each day more and more that they are claiming more and more independence.  It’s bittersweet.  I know they are supposed to do that, but why so soon?

The Spooktacular was spectacular.  We sang “Thriller” together, ate many yummy treats, and enjoyed the festivities.  “These are the days of our lives” (Queen).  The moments that happen…as John Lennon sang “life is what happens to you while you’re busy making other plans”.  I enjoyed life with my sons tonight.

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